Ever had a question about relationships or sex that you just can’t ask your oncology care provider? Ever felt too shy to ask a nurse or doctor a question, but really needed the answer? Now you can ask those questions and get answers from Dr. Anne Katz, the Awkward Auntie! We’re back for another round of Awkward Auntie. Read on for some more recent Q&As!
Question: Am I ever going to crave sex again? Or feel some kind of normal? I’m about a month from chemotherapy and currently struggling with vaginal discomfort and dryness, and the idea of sex right now is not even a thing. I keep thinking, gosh, I am too young to be feeling this way, and how will this affect my marriage? Age range: 26-33 years old
Awkward Auntie: One month after the end of your chemotherapy treatments is very early for many people, even to be thinking about sex. But you are! When you have genital pain due to dryness, of course, your interest in sex is going to be low or even absent. A good place to start is with some self-exploration to figure out what feels good (and bad!), always using a good lubricant (one that is silicone-based is the best because it remains slippery for a long time). In terms of partnered sexual activity, take it slow and use lube for any kind of sexual touch. It is essential to TELL YOUR PARTNER WHAT FEELS GOOD AND WHAT DOESN’T before any sexual activity with them. Expecting them to figure out this new territory you are in is not fair to either of you. COMMUNICATION is key to getting back to some sort of sex life. It is essential to talk to your cancer team – they can refer you and your partner for therapy if that is what you need, and /or to a sexual medicine provider who can advise and/or prescribe local estrogen that will help with the dryness and pain.
You can learn more about this great program, find the answers to past questions, and submit a question of your own by going here!
More about the Awkward Auntie program:
Dr. Anne Katz, also known as the Awkward Auntie, is a certified sexuality counselor and nurse who has written a couple of books about young adults and cancer – and all the things that happen to your body, relationships, and sex during and after treatment. She will answer any and all questions that you send to AwkwardAuntie@lacunaloft.org or submit in the form below. You don’t have to give your name or other identifying information – but it might be helpful for her to know how you identify yourself by gender, your age, and what kind of cancer and treatment you had.
YOU CAN ASK HER ANYTHING…. Don’t hold back! Your questions will be answered periodically and posted on our Awkward Auntie page.
