December 2025 Edition
A Big Year for Me and for Cactus Cancer Society
Hey guys, welcome to the second edition of Cody’s Corner! It’s the end of 2025 already! Did this year go by fast for anyone else, or just me? This was a big year for me and for Cactus Cancer Society! 2025 was the tenth anniversary of Cactus Cancer Society, and this year I was offered the opportunity to help celebrate that by participating in the Young Adult Cancer Advocate of the Year fundraising competition.
As part of that competition, I was provided with the opportunity to go to Cactus Cancer’s 10th Anniversary Gala in San Francisco (it was my first time in California—my sister and I had a good time!). While I was there, I saw all kinds of cool things, such as the Musée Mécanique—a museum that is full of games and machines where you put in quarters to make them run, and you can see things ranging from an antique player piano to playing a quick game of skee ball.
Here’s a picture I took of the main part of the museum:
Here’s a picture I took of the SF skyline when I met up with some friends:
December Thoughts: Hot Chocolate and Gentle Reflection
Now that you’ve seen a little bit of San Francisco, the month of December always makes me think of a few things: hot chocolate (with some whipped cream and marshmallows? Yum!), family parties, and of the year that has just happened.
What comes to your mind when you think about this year? You’ll no doubt have some cancer-related thoughts popping in, but what about some nice thoughts? They might not pop into your mind immediately—you might need to plumb the depths of your mind—but you’ll find something, even if it’s something as simple as ordering some food for delivery or smiling at a meme a friend sent you.
Holiday Seasons During Treatment
Now, I’m not going to lie—holidays during treatment can suck a lot. When I was on my first line of treatment, I went through two birthdays, two Christmases, two Thanksgivings, and I even went to a cousin’s wedding a couple of days after taking my chemo pills (and somehow managed to not vomit on the five-hour car ride!). The days of nausea and vomiting or even just that all-consuming fatigue from treatment (or the anxiety about it coming up!) made the holidays miserable.
My parents and sister accommodated as much as they could—we’d eat the food on days I felt better, but I still didn’t get to experience the holiday on the day itself (which sucked!).
So, what would I do on those days that should’ve been happy because of the holiday season, but instead I felt bad because of treatment? I’d occupy my mind with whatever I could. Sometimes I could only just lie there listening to some music, letting Spotify take me where it may (sometimes to songs I enjoyed, sometimes to songs I skipped).
A few songs I would recommend that just feel right at this time of year are The Atheist Christmas Carol by Vienna Teng and Maybe Next Year by Jenny Owen Youngs.
Here is a link to a collaborative community playlist that I’ve made on Spotify that all of us can add songs to—songs that make you think of the winter season/help you get through it.
Looking Back on Your 2025
Now look back on your 2025. What happened this year? What’d you do? What did you experience? It can be anything, big or small.
Maybe you joined the crappiest club with the best people (aka the YA cancer community)? Maybe you got some good scan results? Maybe you met up with a cancer friend for the first time? Maybe you started meeting up with some cancer friends regularly? Maybe you just took the leap of faith and checked out an online program to see what it was like? Maybe you had a really delicious slice of cake (or pie!) that you’ve been thinking about?
Whatever you did this year was good—whatever you were able to accomplish was big.
You might be trying to compare what you did to your peers (disabled or nondisabled), but that isn’t the way to do things—we all experience things from our own perspectives, and no matter how hard we try, we cannot walk a mile in someone else’s shoes. We don’t know what their tolerance is for whatever issue they may be facing, so even if their story about some humdrum that came up is making you feel a bit frustrated because that’s all they are dealing with—try to let it wash over you, be a duck, and let it be like water off of your back (and since you’re now a duck, let your frustration out with a loud QUACK!).
Taking Care of Yourself This Season
We have all dealt with crap because we have all been dealt crappy cards. We have to do with them what we can. Now, I’m not saying you need to become a smiley happy person wearing sweaters with pompoms and glitter; what you need to do is handle yourself however you can.
If you need to go relax under a blanket with a nice book and a cup of hot cocoa when your house is packed with family members you only see once a year, do that! This time of year is ideal for self-care—you can’t really go outside into the land of cold, so focus on the person who matters most: you.
Go journal, go draw something, go headbang to some music, or shove your head into a pillow and scream as loud as you can—get those emotions out so you can face this season chock-full of tumult and chaos.
If You’re Spending the Holidays Without Family
If you are someone who doesn’t have family to spend the holidays with, reach out to friends—reach out to your found family. They might have things going on on the holiday proper, but everyone can spare a minute or two to chat with a friend.
They might be able to meet up in person on a day near the holiday so you can have a little get-together, or you could just mail each other a postcard so you know you are thinking about each other. You could also ask if they can jump on Zoom, that ubiquitous program that we all know and love, and just spend a few minutes chatting.
A few minutes might turn into a flood of laughter, and before you know it, a few hours might have passed. Even if you just spend a short amount of time together on those cold days of winter, you’re still relaxing with some friends—you’re getting out there and chatting and having a good time.
You could always do a game night or a movie night or just sit around and drink some toasty beverages with each other while you sit on Zoom staring and talking to each other. Find a way to keep your light bright during the dark days—do something to treat yourself.
Media Recommendations
Movies
Scrooged (1988): It’s a modern retelling of A Christmas Carol starring Bill Murray as the Scrooge character. It’s hilarious. (The 80s still count as modern day… right?)
Hook (1991): It’s a classic—Robin Williams plays a grown-up Peter Pan who has to return to Neverland to save his children. Go watch!
50 First Dates (2006): It’s a romantic comedy with Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore that takes place in Hawaii. She plays a woman with amnesia who cannot form new memories. It’s light and fun. Why is a summer movie on this list? Sometimes you just want to feel warm during the winter!
TV Shows
The Great British Baking Show: If you haven’t seen this, start watching it now. It’s British people baking and being so nice to each other—it’s not like any American competition. Warning: If you binge it, you will want a handshake from Paul Hollywood.
New Girl: It was a great comedy in the 2010s that starred Zooey Deschanel as a woman who moved into an apartment with three single guys (played by Jake Johnson, Max Greenfield, and Lamorne Morris). It had 146 episodes.
Pushing Daisies: This cancelled-too-soon show was about a pie maker (played by Lee Pace) who had the ability to raise the dead with one touch. He used his ability to make some delicious pies and solve murders (by helping out a P.I. played by Chi McBride). The show only had 22 episodes, but it had some amazing episodes. Other members of the cast included Kristin Chenoweth (she originated the role of Glinda in Wicked on Broadway) and Ellen Greene (she played Audrey in Little Shop of Horrors).
Music
The collaborative playlist I promised earlier is here
Resources for Young Adults
Make sure to check out YA Cancer Gabfest —if you are reading this, you have surely heard of it. It’s a five-night event where young adults facing cancer get together online for a week of support and good vibes.
There’s also going to be Cactus Cancer’s Holiday Party on the 17th. It should be a fun time!
Emily Hermann @cute.and.acute asked me to let everyone who enjoys drinking tea know that she does a monthly Tea Club (with a virtual meetup!), cuTEA, to help bring comfort to those going through treatment. Look at the Linktree on her Instagram to find the form!
Now, if you are looking for one-on-one support through this tough time of year, check out Imerman Angels to get connected with someone. Cancer Hope Network also provides a similar service (click “Request a Mentor”).
Signing Off
As always, if you have any questions that you want me to answer or resources you want me to provide, please email programs@cactuscancer.org (Subject: Cody’s Corner) or message me on Instagram @CodyHatesCancer.
I hope all of you have a lovely December, and I look forward to talking to you again in the new year!
